Tag Archives: heartbreak

Blind leading blind

Blind Leading the Blind

I find it fascinating how much of our society revolves around the blind leading the blind, but no one making that connection and realizing that is all it is. We live among people always looking for reassurance from the next unknowing person to justify their guilty actions, thoughts, ideas or to cope with insecurities. And I’ve narrowed it down to two main types of people: narcissists who want to justify themselves, and people who enjoy playing victim to escape being at fault for their mishaps. There’s one thing they have in common: being broken.

I’ve met and studied some of the most broken people, and they have either ended up being the most narcissistic people I know: the person who’s ego is so large that it blinds you from the start. But, those types can be broken down. You either have the obnoxious know-it-all, rub-my-accomplishments-in-your-face-and-your-face-and-your-face or the elusive charmer who makes everyone feel like their only one but who’s only actual concern is themselves and their need for pleasure in whatever form they enjoy it- whether it be physical, emotional, or mental. Or, there’s the victim who can still cause and create just as much pain, but who never takes the blame because they somehow are not responsible for it. It’s the I-never-had-love person or the so-much-trauma-has-left-me-sad-and-needy-always-seeking-externally-person. In either sense, no one wants to take responsibility for themselves, the effect they have on others, and for contributing to the cycle of ignorance and mistreatment of human emotion and human psyche.

Amidst these two majorities, there are rare instances when you meet someone who doesn’t fall into either category. That’s not to say they’ve never experienced pain or trauma, because usually they have. But, what separates them is their ability to recognize it and to want to get to the heart of the problem and tackle it head on, instead of pretending it doesn’t exist or allowing it to be the excuse for not being whole. When you face the issue head-on, you go through a healing process.

The healing process is so important and necessary in order to move forward in life. It allows us to gain understanding, not only of the issue-at-hand but of ourselves. And, that’s because healing requires solitude. Solitude is something so many of us struggle with because we constantly seek approval and reassurance externally. We depend on others to legitimize us so we never learn the truth of ourselves, and we use a combination of lies we’ve been told by others and lies we tell ourselves as a foundation for our actions and reactions to various situations.

If we could sit in solitude and learn to be at peace with it, and love that space then we will learn our truth. And in doing so, we will no longer fall into one of those two categories, which are both toxic to ourselves and to those around us – hence, blind leading blind. We will stop being blind and open our eyes to the truths we’ve ignored for so long. We will stop allowing others to define us and we will learn to RESPECT ourselves and our relationships. Because, in case we don’t know, the way we treat our relationships is also a direct reflection of our character.

So, being a liar, cheater, manipulator or abuser in a relationship and getting away with it may make you feel macho and smooth and suave, but in all actuality, those of us who are not metaphorically blind and see that  just see a poor, lost soul who has not yet felt true joy or pure happiness. Just a miserable person who feels so empty that the only way to get a taste of what they think is happiness, is by inflating their ego through one of those methods. And if those people that are hurt and misguided accept your antics, and that makes you feel good about yourself then that’s your prerogative. That simply means you’ve accepted mediocrity and personal growth is invaluable to you. That’s fine, more room for those of us who enjoy being mentally elevated and informed and free from drama and pettiness.

But, just know this: you’re only fooling the fools.

xxoo,

logo


Cease Fire

Fionnabeachhand

I think about a time when…

The raging fire

Of hate in your eyes

Is extinguished by

My rush of love

Peace for all.

xoxo,

logo


Love Drifter

solitude

My empty heart

It drifts away

And sometimes

The love it holds

Spills away

Sometimes, this love

I can’t take away

But other times

These thoughts

Keep love at bay

When will this heart

Relax and let go

Of all the things

It doesn’t yet know

xoxo,

logo


Heart’s Intent

 

shywoman

It’s always my intention… my goal… to love unconditionally. But, my heart has a condition. It screams for love requited. And when disappointed or betrayed, it runs… far. Withdrawing from the betayer, the once-warm vessel turns cold. A heart that showered with love, runs dry. A defense mechanism, indeed. An imperfect heart that has yet to master unconditional love.

Once this heart has mastered the art of true, pure, unconditional love then it shall be free from heartbreak, resentment, anger, and suffering. When this heart completely accepts and understands that betrayal cannot be taken personally [because that is only a reflection of the betrayer's damaged heart] then it shall be at peace.

A master of love this heart will grow to be.

xoxo,

logo


Do you?

IMG_0414.JPG

Break ups can be so strange. When we decide to enter a relationship with someone, we are giving ourselves permission to open up and share the parts of us we normally keep from the world… Emotionally, mentally, physically. Our lives are intertwined, we adjust and compromise some of our ways to allow the relationship to blossom. And then, somewhere along the way, things change. Hearts shift, intentions sway and oftentimes, resentment builds until the relationship shatters. And then we break up, and usually become strangers. But, we pick up our pieces and continue living our lives separately. But sometimes, when the wind kisses our skin, when the rain softly sings it’s song, when the moon gently smiles down on us nostalgically… We remember a favorite chapter from the story of us. The laughs we shared, the kiss that made us blush, the secret that was only ours… And just for a second, before the chaos of life demands our attention back, we wonder if, in that same moment, you are sharing that same thought and feeling. A moment that still keeps us connected even while we are worlds away from what used to be.

xoxo,

logo


HER

laughingBeauty

But…

When she smiles

When she REALLY smiles

Wow!

It makes

Them lose

Their dignity

Their self-respect

Cat calls

Dog howls

Each competing

For HER

To turn around

Hoping to

Bask

In the warmth

Of her lips

xoxo,

logo


Soul Windows

20140710-220742-79662712.jpg
Piling on
Mascara layers
And heavy, dark eyeliner

To bring life
To her eyes
Since they’re dead inside


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 27 other followers